S4E16: GROW Your 1-on-1 Process With Goals

Jason discusses the Forbes article "Planning Your Team’s 1:1s? Use This 4-Step Framework."

GROW Framework

• Goals
• Reality
• Options
• Way Forward

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Transcript

0:44

Did you know that up to 82% of new managers are left completely in the dark, untrained and searching for answers? That lack of preparation doesn't just hurt your new leaders. It holds your entire business back, draining morale and costing you productivity. Stop the clock on bad management. Golden Mean Consulting offers a proven no fluff approach to help your new managers build the right habits from day one. Our co-founders Sonia and Jason have over 20 years of experience in the trenches, so you can trust they know what works. To learn more, visit golden means consultinggroup.com. That's g o ldemeultinggroup.com. Wherever you are on your leadership voyage, it starts here. Hey everybody, welcome back to another episode of Leadership Voyage, the podcast dedicated to your pursuit of becoming a great leader. And I emphasize your this podcast exists for the listeners to be able to improve their leadership skills, improve their management skills, or just take something that you might be able to learn and apply to your own life outside of the work world if it makes sense to you that way. Outstanding uh to do it that way as well. I cannot believe it's October. How is it October of 2025 already? Unbelievable. But before we get to the meat of today's episode, which is a little bit more about one-on ones, that allimportant meeting, before we get to that call to action, if you are listening but not subscribed, click subscribe. Maybe you're listening on your phone and Apple Podcasts or you're listening on your work laptop on Spotify. Whatever that might be, click subscribe. And if you are subscribed and you have not rated the show, it's time. This show has been out for four seasons now. And if you have subscribed and listened, please provide an honest rating. That's what I ask of you all. If you're listening and not subscribed, click that button. If you're subscribed and you listen with some regularity, please rate the show. Moving on. Here we go. So today I'm excited to talk about one-on- ons and this was inspired, you know, today's episode is one of the solo episodes where I'm kind of repackaging things that I've read and drawing from other sources to essentially put together a presentation around some ideas for you so that you don't have to go find all of it. You can just take it, apply it, and evaluate it. And in this one, it's by an author, Rachel Wells, who's a contributor to Forbes.com. Rachel covers leadership, AI, and upskilling. And in this particular writeup, it's about a four-step framework on how to improve one-on- ons. We have covered one-on- ones on this show a couple of times. In season 1, episode 6, we talked about five failures of the one-on-one. So, if you're interested afterwards, make sure you go back to season 1, episode 6. And then not that long ago, season 4 episode 12, I discussed some ideas around killing one-on- ons, moving them to quarterly, and only being about performance and development. So, if you're interested in the one-on-one topic, you can dive a little deeper after this episode. season 1 episode 6 and season 4 episode 12. So here we go. Rachel Wells and the link will be in the show description for you all if you want to read the article for yourselves. It is called Planning Your Teams one-on- ons use this fourstep framework. So what I'm going to do is this. I'm going to give you a very quick overview of this article by Rachel Wells and then I'm going to go in depth a little bit more around the framework that Rachel presents and she even cites some of uh her approach from others. And so it's kind of this carrying it forward, bringing it along, taking it for what it is and adapting it for your own situation, which I love, right? people inspire others who inspire others and hopefully this episode will inspire some folks to think about their one-on- ones and how they are handling them. So, here we go. Okay, again, Forbes leadership article, Rachel Wells. It's all there in the show description for you folks if you want to check it out for yourselves. Okay, the first thing in this story is that Rachel calls out that too often one-on ones are status updates. where managers are also pointing out areas where employees can improve. Now, um using one-on- ones as status updates is one of the things that I talk about often because the one-on-one is for the employee, not the manager. and a manager getting status updates is kind of a misuse of the meeting. But Rachel goes even further to say that this is not effective in the year 2025. She cites some Harvard Business Review research that shows what employees want from managers. She says they're looking for managers who are caring, empathetic, and human- le. And I have said multiple times in the most recent episodes of this podcast that Gallup has shown that the two things people want from leaders are hope and trust. So this aligns very well with all of that. Finally, in this topic of kind of what one-on- ones tend to look like versus what they could be, uh the author says that one-on- ones should focus holistically on the employee. They should focus on unlocking their potential and their growth and not just focus on their job performance. Now again, I know many of you out there listening, you are in pressure cookers. You've got 15 to1 manager to employee ratios. I get it. But we're trying to come back to these ideas that will truly differentiate you as a manager and maybe boost your employee engagement and organizational effectiveness to levels that create competitive advantages. We all say it starts with the people, but our actions as managers should reflect that it does start with the people, right? These aren't chess pieces, right? These aren't cogs in a machine on an assembly line. These are human beings who have lives and have friends and family. And it's very important to remember that it's not just about you as the individual contributor, me getting you to move from A to B. It's about me as the manager telling you that I care about you, that there's a vision, that you can trust me, that we're here to do great things together, but I care about you and helping you become a better version of yourself. And here in lies the framework. Everybody likes a framework, right? So Rachel writes about the grow model, GR O W, which was I guess coined by Sir John Whitmore. I'm not familiar with with John Whitmore, but I will be digging into it a little bit soon. Uh it's a coaching framework used for conducting one-on- ons. And the author says that using a coaching leadership style is what gets the best out of your team. It translates to high performance when you think of yourself as a coach and lead as a coach. Now, I'm going to step back for a second here. What does it mean to coach? Right? We can think of sports for a second. And you know, a coach might call the plays, right? A coach might tell the players where to go, but in essence, the key point here is they aren't showing them exactly how to do it. They're enablers for the execution that happens on that playing field. And so when you think about what it means to be a coach when you're a manager or a leader, there are some distinct differences between teaching, mentoring, facilitating, and coaching. If you're not aware of these distinctions, I'd encourage you to step back and think about it. We're trying to talk about coaching leadership style here. So what are the differences between teaching, mentoring, facilitating and coaching? Teaching is when you tell someone about something. You give them new information so that they can learn about it. Mentoring is when you've been there before. You've done it before. And you say, "Here's what I've done in the past. Here's what you can do. I'm going to mentor you and tell you the ways that I've done this that have been successful and also show you the pitfalls to avoid. Facilitating, think of it as someone who's running a meeting, right? They're making sure people are in the right place. They're making sure we're talking about the right stuff. And then coaching is largely asking questions to help others selfrealize drawing that out of them so that they are owning their own path. They are the most active participant in the entire journey or perhaps on this show we should say voyage. Does that make sense? Coaching in our context is someone who is drawing the answers out of someone, not giving them to them, showing them the way, or teaching them about it. Now, there are moments for all of those other three buckets, but this is what we're talking about with this grow framework. Okay, so I hope that that sets the stage. Uh the author talks about how she's used this uh and gotten superior results by using this grow model framework. She even cites some really fun stats about how perform um how how performant her teams have been. And finally here, rather than thinking of one-on- ones as something you're just checking a box, right? Oh, well, I have to meet my bi-weekly with whomever. Uh yeah, yeah, what's your status update? It's thinking about turning this into a valuable coaching session. And I've said this several times over the last few episodes, but let me just remind everybody if you're running one-on ones now and you want to run them differently, just tell your employees. It's pretty simple. Just say, "I want to try a new format for these. This is what we're going to start doing in one, two, three months. We're going to check in on how it's going for everybody." It's not that bad. Not that hard, right? Sometimes we we think we have to be this magician as a manager. Just tell them straightforward what you're doing. No big deal. You don't have to be pulling puppet strings, right? Okay. So, now we're gonna get into the meat of it. We're going to talk about this grow model framework. Remember, we're trying to get the best out of people, support them, and unlock their potential. We want to be coaches. And now, we're going to go through the grow framework. It's an it's an acronym, right? like all good um good frameworks, aren't they? Hold on. I need to get a sip of coffee. While I'm getting that sip of coffee, go ahead and um uh make sure you uh you subscribe or rate the show, please. Wink wink. And so, we're going to step through this this uh acronym G W. Grow. Okay. So, first the G stands for the word goal. And I'm actually going to drop uh an anecdote here or a snip from snippet from a previous guest. Season 1 episode 4, Maria Okarund uh creating effective teams. I'm going to play this first and then talk through the actual definition of what this means. Goals is the reason a team exists. M there and there are so many different kinds of goals also. So there are external goals uh which are you know the goals that tell the team what they are supposed to deliver to external stakeholders like clients or management or stuff like that. So that is usually when it comes to teams in in work life that's the reason that that a team exists to deliver something to external stakeholders. But there are also internal goals uh which are to do with the development that I just talked about. Do you know the real reason half your employees are looking to leave? Untrained firsttime managers. You need a way to stop the bleeding, the expensive cycle of disengagement and turnover. It's time to flip the script from surviving to thriving. Let's equip your leaders to build engaged, loyal, and profitable teams. Sign your leaders up for our six-week new manager boot camp. A hands-on accelerated program to grow and learn with like-minded peers augmented by personalized coaching sessions. No theory, just simple tools that Golden Mean Consulting co-founders Sonia and Jason have used for over 20 years. Ready to invest in your team's success? Secure your spot now at golden means consultinggroup.com/services. That's g o ldemultinggroup.com/services. So you heard Maria say right there that you know she likes thinking about goals because that's why a team was created. And when you if you never thought of it that way it makes so much sense. uh I need to deliver something so I build a team. And what we're talking about in this article in this grow framework is starting with the letter G goal. So the author says don't start your one-on-one by talking about past performance. Reiterate or define the short-term and long-term goals for that employee. And that isn't just metrics, which is maybe what Maria was talking about there as far as what we're giving to a stakeholder, right? I have a KPI that we need to be hitting. Great. That's one goal. Fine. But also include professional development um and growth. So redefine or define or revisit the goals that you have for the employee with them. Not just the numbers that matter to the business, but also the professional growth or development goals for them that support getting them where they want to go that align with where the business is going. And there are some really great examples in this article talking about upskilling. Um I told you that um the author talks uh writes about leadership AI and upskilling. So upskilling goals um peer mentoring goals or how they could support another team. They even call out a PTO goal. I have literally never heard of this and I can't even imagine how many hours, days or weeks of my life I've spent reading about leadership and management. I have never heard of a PTO goal, but perfect. If you've got someone who is struggling to take time off or find balance in their life and you know that that is a barrier, help them figure out that that should be a goal for them. But listen to Maria, who was the clip you just heard. Listen to the author, Rachel. Let's start with goals. What is it we're trying to achieve short and long term metrics wise and actions and behavior-wise for the employees growth and development? Now, that takes us to the letter R, which is reality. And I just said about 30 seconds ago probably something like you know what are the obstacles or what what might be getting in the way of them doing something and let's define and identify that as something that could be a goal. This one I'm going to pull in Brian Slade. If you didn't hear it, it was season 2 episode 9. Brian Slade was one of I mean, I have to tell you, I'd say it was one of my favorite conversations I've maybe ever had with any person ever. Uh Brian's a combat rescue helicopter pilot, I think that's right, in the Air Force. And he wrote a book called Cleared Hot. And I think when we start to think about goals and then we more realistically as this framework suggests the letter R reality a lot of realworld obstacles come up. They start to get in the way of our goals. And before we dive into the specifics of this framework around the R reality, I wanted to share Brian Slade's perspective on learning obstacles and the growth that comes from that. I I think the biggest the biggest the big the easiest way to learn is to look for it, to pay attention, right? to to do a little self analysis at the end of each day and be like, "Holy [ __ ] this just happened. What what why did that happen, right? And what how did I how did I react to it or or cause it or whatever?" Just analyze it and understand and this is something that I I really preach is and and it's not me. This came from someone else. I'm this is there are no new lessons. We're just regurgitating things with different words, right? But stuff doesn't happen to you, happens for you, right? And so if you really see that everything that happens in a day happens for you and then at the end of the day or when you can take a pause and you really look back at it and say, "Well, I don't see how this happened for me. It really feels like it happened to me." And dive into figuring that piece out. So, it's that kind of a a thing. And that practice, at least something I've tried to to make a practice, becomes easier and easier the more you do it. Just like any muscle, just like any exercise, the more you do it, the more it becomes second nature to analyze and pay attention, right? Obstacles, trials, trauma, all of that is just cleverly disguised opportunity. So, that's Brian Slade. Really interesting book to read. Cleared hot. uh as I said, Air Force and he really had dedicated a lot of his energy uh at least when we spoke over two and a half years ago to um to really helping people kind of work through what he's worked through which is PTSD. But trauma, obstacles, as he said, is cleverly disguised opportunity. And that gets us into the R of reality, which is as a coach, you the manager, as a coach, help your employee explore their current reality and how their actions are progressing them towards their goals. But when you ask this questions, you're encouraging self-awareness and honest reflection. The questions you ask ask are everything. What challenges are you facing? What support are you lacking? What have you tried that isn't working? As you're helping them explore their reality, you're finding the things that might be in the way of their goals. And if you can help them embrace a mindset that they own their growth path, you're a coach. They own their growth path. They might see that personal accountability to a new level like Brian was talking about all the things that happened to me today, which is kind of like maybe think of it as more of a victim mindset, right? What happened to me today? His reframing is what happened for me today? Those challenges were information that was given to us to help us figure out how to navigate it differently. It's a really refreshing perspective. I think if we're feeling stuck, lost, like things are happening to us and it's out of our control, thinking of that as something that's happening for us, I think is a really powerful statement. So G is the goal, R is the reality. We want to help the employee explore their reality. And then we get to the last two on the list, which will go a little bit quicker. O is options. So this is where the coaching mentality comes in, folks. Rather than jumping in and telling them the answer to overcoming their reality in pursuit of their goal, rather than jumping in and solving it, be curious. Make it a partnership. Brainstorm. Ask open-ended questions. Think of it as the manager facilitating the employees professional growth experience. So I want to reach this goal. The reality are are these things are in my way or these things are helping me right? Oh options. What are the options I have to pursue my goal? And then the W is the way forward. They've explored with you through this partnership what their concrete options are through the letter O in options and now they have to select what they're going to do. Focus on a shortterm goal that creates progress and momentum in service of the long-term goals. This is really important that the employee makes the choice here. Okay, that's what the article suggests because that's where the accountability comes in. We don't create the action plan for the employee. They own their growth path. They define their way forward by choosing an option that creates a baby step of progress and momentum. and then make sure to have them uh you know some way or another commit that to that that's what they're doing so that you can check up next time and that's grow goal reality options way forward I love it simple it calibrates you keeps you focused on a narrow area keeps the the goal in sight while the the way forward is small and digestible And the author says, "The benefits of this are that it moves your one-on-one from a check-in to a coaching and growth session. It shows the employee that the manager cares, right? It helps them with that trust. It also provides autonomy by them owning it rather than micromanagement where you dictate the solutions as a manager. And this is going to boost not only performance because they'll be focused on their goals, but it also helps them be more motivated because they're owning it. They're accountable to themselves with your help. So, grow grality options way forward as a new proposed way to handle one-on ones, particularly as it relates to goals and performance. So, let me know what you think. Have you heard of this before? I'd love to hear it. Did this new idea spark some a catalyst, you know, something happen for you? Let me know. Uh, do you think I don't know there's a flaw in this idea? There's a flaw in every model, right? Every framework is flawed. That's they exist for a reason, but they're just a starting point we have to use to our own uh situations or context. But are there flaws in it? I'd love to hear. But anyway, my hope is that you got a little bit out of this episode to go apply to your one-on- ons as the manager. And if you're the employee, if you don't run one-on- ons, guess what? You could bring it to your manager as an idea for how you'd love to see your one-on ones run. It's tangible, tactical, focused, useful, all the things we're looking for in a framework that could get us started in the right direction. And then we cater it and tailor it to whatever it is that we need for our particular environment. All right, happy October everyone and until next time everybody take care